We’re all struggling
In a world where division seems increasingly prevalent, I want to address the one thing we all have in common: struggle, adversity, and hardship. Regardless of how much money someone has, what they were born with or without, the one truth I know is this — every single one of us has faced adversity. Chances are, you're going through something right now. I know I am.
I have almost daily calls with a close friend, biweekly walks with another dad, and regular conversations with a colleague who helps me navigate my business. And personally, it feels like I'm climbing uphill more often than not.
From the outside, things may look good — calm, even easy. But beneath the surface, there's a powerful current constantly pulling us away from our goals, our peace, and our joy. Two of my closest friends, both financially well off, battle emotional, mental, and physical health challenges every day. Another friend made the courageous leap from corporate America to start her own business — and in doing so, lost her health insurance. She recently broke her foot and is facing surgery that will be a significant financial setback. As for me, I live a blessed life, yet I still wrestle with bouts of depression, feel overwhelmed by work, travel, and passion projects like this one — all while striving to be the best single father I can be. And any single parent will tell you: it comes with guilt. As I write this, I’m sitting in an airport in El Paso, flight delayed, and had to FaceTime my son to let him know dad won’t be at his baseball game.
Neither I, nor my friends, nor you are alone in these battles. We are not unique. In fact, our struggles are what bond us together. What we have in common isn't our clothes, our homes, or our cars — it's the weight we each carry.
So how do we deal with it all? I'd love to offer a quick fix, but they simply don't exist. What does exist is the ability to build mental and emotional strength and resilience. Here are three ways to start:
1. Don't React When life hits you hard — that call, text, or email that sends you spiraling — stop. Your first reaction is likely emotional, not rational. Pause, breathe, and set it aside for an hour or even a day. Talk to someone, vent if you need to, then return to the situation with a clear head and a response that is productive, not destructive.
2. Control What You Can As much as we'd like the world and the people in it to behave the way we think they should, that's simply not how it works. Expecting otherwise is a recipe for anger, resentment, and misery. Focus on your own actions and reactions, accept what is beyond your control, and let the rest go. Easier said than done — I know. But the more you practice it, the more natural it becomes.
3. Ask Yourself: Is It Worth It? Will this situation matter in 5 hours? 5 days? 5 months? 5 years? More often than not, the answer is no. When we gain that perspective, we realize that what we're feeling, while real, may not be as significant as it seems in the grand picture of life. Look forward, not backward — and leave it behind you.
If you found this helpful, there's much more in my book Mental Legacy, available now on Amazon.Click Here to Purchase.